Writing Treatmens That Sell (with Chi-Li Wong) Authors' Message What is a Treatment? Script Example Screenplay Example Sample Chapter

:::.............................. SCRIPT EXAMPLE Type of Material: Script Title: Number of pages: Author: Publisher/Date: Submitted by: Circa: Location: Minor Location: Analyst: Category: Date: Elements: Log Line: When robbers of a cache of diamonds and gold bullion realize they've also made away with a box of plutonium, they set off a thrilling chase that couples an unorthodox investigator and a beautiful mid-eastern terrorist. Synopsis: A daring robbery at Dulles Airport garners the masked burglars gold worth $64 million, $1 million in diamonds and an enigmatic green security box. As one of the burglars tries to open the box, his hands are severely burned. When he doesn't move fast enough for the ring leader, he's shot. The insurance company has two weeks to recover the gold and diamonds or be forced to pay $70 million in insurance checks. They inform the Washington Police that they've hired PETER CRANE, the notoriously unconventional, die-hard insurance investigator who sets Police Captain PADDY O'MALLEY'S teeth on edge. Meanwhile, the aforesaid Peter Crane is introduced in Mexico handcuffed, in bed with a woman who's lured him into a confrontation with a chain-saw wielding cohort. Typical fare for this terminator-type detective. Out of Mexico and out of trouble for the moment Peter begins his investigation. The robbery was an inside job assisted by a security guard whose daughter has been kidnapped. Interviewed from his hospital bed, the guard explains how he was forced to comply with the burglars and that AZIZ INTERNATIONAL wanted a special "gift" shipped with the diamonds and gold. A gift placed in a green security box. Peter follows his lead going to the Aziz mansion to speak to Mr. Aziz. As he is strong-armed off the property Mr Aziz stands in the window and unemotionally shoots himself. O'Malley continues his investigation trying hard to assure the Director of International Relations, MR. PARNELL, that he can advise his Arab colleagues he's doing everything he can to locate the missing diamonds. Peter and Zafar have a vicious fight with the guards to get possession of the green box. Trapped in the command room they make their escape through an airshaft. Guards continue to fire at them as Zafar covers Peter while he smashes down the grating and escapes. Bashani picks up Peter Crane behind the sight of a Gunship as runs down the street. The gunship fire indiscriminately kills several people as it misses its mark. The gunship continues after Peter. Suddenly a second gunship appears. Zafar pilots the gunship towards Peter who climbs aboard as they race to the Turkish border. As they get closer to the border Zafar urges Peter to jump the gunship and make it to the border on his own. Peter jumps out with the green box running like a hunted wolf as bullets zip pass him. Zafar watches as Peter makes it to safety through the forest area and then pilots the gunship directly on a collision course with Bashani. The gunships collide in a huge ball of flame. Peter and the green box make it safely to the American Embassy where he is greeted by Parnell. Parnell thanks Peter expecting him to leave the plutonium, but Peter isn't giving it up so easily. Parnell pulls a gun. Peter puts two and two together realizing who supplied the plutonium to the Arabs. Parnell was ready to create a new cold war. Parnell imagines a nuclear war between the Jews and the Arabs blowing each other off the face of the earth. Parnell presses his gun against Peter's neck. "Check the safety" Peter says. Parnell's split second of hesitation costs him as Peter knocks the gun to the floor and flings Parnell against the wall with a bone jarring kick. Parnell retrieves the gun, shooting Peter high in the shoulder. Ecstatic Parnell gets to his feet and moves toward Peter. Peter catches Parnell's legs and catapults him over his shoulder out the window. Parnell is dead pinned to the spire of the mosque. Comments: This is pure non-stop action supported by a very intriguing plot. Peter Crane is an exciting, well developed character. He is a "bad-boy" hero who is thoroughly appealing. With the right director, who lets him stay bad and brings out the sex-appeal in an already-very sexy plot, Crane could easily become a "Dirty Harry" figure in future movies. As an insurance investigator, he's not limited to "doing good." Everything about the character and the script spells commercial. The action sequences are compellingly and convincingly spelled out, cut by cut, and the script is powerfully visual. Zafar's character, especially after her amazing buildup and the revelation that she's a woman, serves well as Peter's nemesis and love interest. Her sacrifice in the end to save him is poignant--as well as leaving Crane free for future amours and adventures. Their sarcastic banter is a wonderful tool in revealing the inner mechanics of these two strong characters who are well matched in this story. O'Malley, though stereotypical, is a good minor character who plays well off the eccentricities of Peter Crane's character. He's our bobbling official who is easily grated by Peter's bending of the rules but can't help really liking the guy. The issue of middle eastern politics may cause some to pause, but as written, it's skillfully handled--a nameless ayatollah/terrorist somewhere in the Middle East, it being a safe bet that the middle east will always have a nameless ayatollah causing trouble. The script is written for a $20-$30 million budget, but might be adapted for the $5-$8 million range with a foreshortening of the physical stunts, optical, and special effects (although that would be a shame).